Lulu: A Story of Mother-Child Bonding in Nigeria

Adefunke Ekine

Lulu attends a faith-based preschool where his mother is a classroom teacher. She has been working there since before her wedding, and her knowledge of early childhood education and early stimulation has helped her to give Lulu, her first child, a head start in life. Lulu has responded positively to the care and nurture he receives at home and school and is a very lively and active boy.

Lulu’s story is presented here as told by and with permission from his parents, Akin and Temilade Omirin. Lulu attends a preschool founded by Adefunke Ekine over 24 years ago. About 3,000 children have passed through the school during that time, and some pupils are second-generation learners whose parents are former students. Every child that attends the school has an equal opportunity to learn while having fun and being nurtured.

Lucas Omirin, nicknamed “Lulu,” was born just three hours after his dad’s birthday and it was immediately obvious that he was going to be a curious boy. He opened his eyes as soon as he got out! Since then, it’s been one moment of drama after another. He is a bright kid and can be mischievous, so patience, attention, and lots of energy are necessary for his parents.

His inquisitive nature could turn a carefully arranged space into a chaos zone. At age 2, he did not talk much, but would act with a lot of spontaneity and make his parents scream out “LULU!”—an alias that stuck with time. He tended to test the durability of his toys, which often led to their total destruction. WHAT A TERRIBLE 2!!!

At age 3, with daily attendance at the preschool, Lulu had acquired a large vocabulary through socializing with his classmates and listening to the many storytelling sessions. In fact, Lulu was becoming a chatterbox and even a bit confrontational. With the benefit of Mummy’s expertise, however, such situations are turned into dialogue time.

In one instance, Mummy wanted to watch a television series, but since he was viewing one of his favorite cartoon series, he insisted, “No! I want to watch katun” (pronouncing it with the local dialect). “You have been at it all day,” Mummy retorted, then went all in with, “This is my husband’s house and I can watch whatever I want.” But Lulu simply explained that it is his Daddy’s house. It was the beginning of the dialogues between him and his mum.

On another occasion, he wanted to get an ice cream on the way home from school, but Mummy bought a fizzy drink instead. She needed a treat after a long, tiring day at work; remember, she teaches a class of 20 four-year-olds with one assistant all day long. But Lulu sulked all the way home.

Yet Daddy points out that not all is war between Lulu and his mother. There are moments when Lulu will affirm her and she seems to like that a lot, and may even put him up to it.

“Mummy, you look beetifu!” Lulu said when she stood in front of the mirror trying on her wig. Sometimes she simply asks, “Lulu, is this fine?” as she puts on a skirt she just altered. Lulu’s mum also works as a fashion designer after school to augment the family income. (In Nigeria, the take-home pay of teachers and caregivers is often insufficient for their needs, which is a major reason for the inadequate numbers of trained personnel in the education sector.)

Lulu loves to drum, or, to put it more accurately, make noise, with empty plastic bottles. He learned this activity from various scenarios both at home and in school. He would drum to accompany either the school anthem or nursery rhymes and, at times, the national anthem. The resultant rumblings are mostly endured as his parents do not wish to douse what may be a talent of his. He also shows a lot of interest in creative arts, playing with diverse color paints.

Lulu is very active and enjoys playing with his peers. He becomes totally engrossed in his activities and it can be a bit difficult to stop him. The preschool he attends presents a rich curriculum that allows the preschoolers to have fun with water, play dough, and color paints. On the days such activities are planned, you can see the excitement on the children faces, especially Lulu’s.

With so much energy, you would think Lulu would eat big! But eating can be yet another time for mother-child conversations. “Lulu,” Mummy will call. “What will you eat?” “I’ll eat garri” (cassava granules), he replies. “No you can’t. Garri isn’t food,” replies Mummy. “It is snacks.” But he insists, “It’s food now. I don’t take garri to school. I take coco pops, biscuits to school.” When Lulu wants to express his hunger, it’s also in his own way. He would say, “Mummy, my stomach is small!,” pulling up his shirt to demonstrate.

Lulu likes to go out; the destination isn’t of much importance, as long as they exit the house. On one Sunday, he wanted to wear white canvas shoes with his traditional attire. His parents told him, “Lulu, you cannot wear that with native attire,” explaining that black shoes are meant to be worn with that attire while the white canvas shoes are only to be used with jeans and the like. Without a word, he goes back and brings out black canvas shoes! And that was that.

His parents try to make sure Lulu channels as much energy into reading and word formation as he does with playtime. This isn’t the easiest thing to do. Sometimes, he is uninterested in his books, dilly dallying and spending hours on it, nearly wearing his parents out.

As Lulu becomes more aware of his environment, his desires begin to change. Now he is beginning to show interest in pets and animals, which is not too strange for his age. He has seen on the screen wild and domestic animals and wanting one is part of learning for him.

But Lulu wants a live elephant! “Mummy, please buy me an elephant,” he demands. “OK, I will.” This response is a strategic one in play, as whatever Lulu wants, he wants! Any explanation about why he cannot have it is futile. It seems to work because he walks away, but he soon comes back. “Mummy, don’t buy the big one, buy the small one, OK?” He uses his hands to indicate size and advises, “The big one can destroy the whole house!”

Well, big or small, he never did get the elephant, and never mentioned it again. What he did ask for and kept mentioning was a puppy. The dog-loving family already had two Alsatians, Tyron and Jackson. Since the family’s current dogs are large breeds, they thought getting a smaller one would be a good idea and so suggested that. As it took some time to get the dog, however, Lulu became impatient about the whole process. “Mummy,” Lulu said, “we will go and buy a puppy.” “Yes, we will,” she replied.

Lulu did have some reservations. “Mummy, when we get it, people will not come to our house again.” “That’s right, they won’t.” “Ah! People will not come to our house again?” “Uhn hun,” Mummy affirmed. “Mummy! Don’t bring the dog again, so people can come to our house!,” he said. But later that day while coming back from school, he said, “Mummy, are we going to get that dog now, are we going there now? Mummy, let us go and get our dog.”

Now, Lulu pretty much has it all. He is really excited about Tessy, his Eskimo dog puppy, and his parents hope she is able to match his energy. They instruct him constantly about how to care for a puppy, so it doesn’t get overwhelmed with his “care and affection.” Lulu and Tessy are getting along really fine and should become great companions. As Lulu learns about animals at the preschool and loves his pet Tessy at home, he is becoming a responsible young boy.

Lulu’s outlook on the world around him has been greatly shaped by the influence of his mother, who has embraced the importance of early stimulation as she practices her profession both at work and at home. Hopefully with more preschool teachers being passionate and enthusiastic about their role as teachers and caregivers, more children like Lulu will develop holistically.